There is a saying, comparison is the thief of joy. This is a real issue for our parents, and something we, as ECE teachers, can help them counter. Many parents are really excited by something their child has done...until they notice another child further along the developmental path, and their excitement deflates instantly.
Being part of a heart-centred team is a beautiful thing. This ‘tribe’ will support each other, have shared understandings, are good company, and notice ‘fuel tank’ levels and will take action to make deposits (in their own and their teammates) to keep them topped up. The energy will be positive and genuine, even in the challenging times.
The team is important, yes, but it is not the only heart-centred ‘set up’ available. Some heart-teachers or carers don’t have the team. They are perhaps working solo in a home setting, or work with others but at this stage are the first to take the heart path.
Happiness. That is perhaps the most common answer when parents or anyone who cares deeply about children are asked what, above all else, they want for them in life. “I just want them to be happy”. And of course that is a lovely thing, and an important one. But we would like to throw another priority out on the table. Our top pick, our 'above all else', wish for children is kindness. For them to experience kindness and offer kindness. Now and in their future.
George Eliot said,
“what do we live for, if not to make life less difficult for each other”?
This is an interesting one to ponder as a team, as so often the least strong part of our entire practice is what we do for each other.
We may serve children beautifully, and be warm and responsive to families, but to the teachers and management we spend our days with? Whether we class these people as friends, or merely ‘colleagues’, sometimes there is very little that is collegial about how we treat each other.
The need to feel heard is a very real one. There is little that is as frustrating as when we pour our hearts out, or finally put words to a quiet fear, only to receive a flippant response. We don’t feel heard when what we communicate is shut down, brushed off, downgraded, or made light of.
Play is as innate in our children as pecking is in chickens. They don’t need us to teach them how to play, just to allow them to do what comes so naturally.
There is concern over this generation of children losing the art of playing, and it’s often presented under two misconceptions: that it is somehow the fault of the children, and that it’s just inevitable - nothing can be done about it. We call WRONG on both.
This name we have for ourselves - teacher - makes us feel we must be ‘teaching’. You know, as in the transmitting of knowledge, the deciding, planning, ‘extending’. Then there can be some sense of a knowable, showable outcome for this time immersed in nature. But for children to really make sense of the world they need to explore it on their terms. They can and will grow in the environment just by being in it, following where curiosity takes them, and using their hands and play urges to try out this and that. They don’t need us to teach. They know how to be in nature, and they know how to play.
We give our children a great gift when we allow them to truly be IN nature. They have an innate connection with this beautiful earth of ours, but they can only maintain this connection with our support. They need unstructured time outdoors, playing in nature, and with all the treasures it has to offer.
We get our families on board with our nature-fying when we invite them along on the journey, and involve them in our processes. No one likes to have things done to them, so dumping a nature programme on our parents with no collaboration isn’t likely to be received well. Even if we’ve established a lot and a family is new, immerse them in the journey from their get-go. Invite them and involve them. Be open to the possibilities that every single new community member can offer. Tha is why there is no end to this path we’re on. Every new relationship we make brings the chance for new learning and ideas.
We’ve worked months on our new toolkit about young children in nature. We’ve written tens of thousands of words on multiple related topics, presented them beautifully and created additional resources to accompany. A lot of hard work and a lot of heart work, and then we had a burst of inspiration, the ‘penny dropped’ and we realised the absolute simplicity of the message.
We can take inspiration for how to be with children outdoors by looking at how gardeners nurture the plants in their garden. We can aspire to this more gentle, non-interfering manner than to the traditionally thought of ‘teaching teacher’.
Our children are born with an innate connection to the earth. They are a part of nature, and crave to continue that connection.
When they have freedom in a natural environment you see how authentic their joy is in this type of setting. They want to be outdoors, IN nature, learning WITH and THROUGH nature. They want to keep this bond strong. They know how to, it’s not something we need to ‘teach’, but we absolutely need to allow for it. We need to offer the right space, lots of uninterrupted time, and see the inherent value of young children being truly immersed in a natural setting.
Being passionate. It is something high on the list of qualities for an ECE teacher, and rightly so.
There is certainly a need for passion if we are to serve our children well, and to rise above the level of care that is called ‘good enough’ in our sector, but we know is not good enough. We want to offer exceptional care, and passion seems to be one of the major ingredients needed to make this happen.
We so often forget that our young children don’t need new, new, new all the time. They find the familiar comforting rather than ‘boring’.
If the environment and materials we offer are stable for them, they can invest their energy in playing, creating, and navigating the social landscape. If each time they arrive there is a new set up their energy goes into orienting themselves instead, into finding the ‘lay of the land’. It is only once they’ve found that sense of security they can engage in play and relationships.
A really powerful saying we love talks about how your energy introduces you before you even open your mouth. Your energy. Is that something you’ve put a lot of thought into?
Often during our training and first few years as a teacher we put a ton of thought into the words we use. We might put the same focus on what we say (and equally don’t) if we then find ourselves on a journey to being more heart-centred.
Here in Aotearoa, we are a nation stunned. And in mourning. And sad. Angry, At a loss with how to respond to the news of a mass shooting in our own little country.
Late last night a friend messaged me, asking how people like us are supposed to deal with this news, and how can we help. The ‘like us’ I think she means is the kind people, the ones who celebrate diversity. The ones who want to raise their children immersed in love and safety. Parent ‘me’ came to mind instantly, but as the questions swirl, the me involved in ECE pops up too. In that immediate moment, I wondered if there is anything at all we can actually do. Over this morning’s coffee I realised there is. What can people like us do?
To care for the young child is to also care for their parents. They are so inextricably woven together that we can't do one without the other.
And if we are to care for our parents we need to leave out the judgements and embrace them for who they are and how they do things.
We can view our teaching career in two different ways: as a series of roles, promotions, qualifications and upskilling, or as a story of pivotal moments that changed and shaped our practice.
The first way looks more at the big tangible moments, whereas the latter is in the smaller, but just as significant, human moments. They may not be as recognisable to others, and there mightn’t be a certificate to mark that growth, but it’s there all the same. We really do believe it’s the little moments, our lived experiences that matter most on our journey.
The quiet pull into or away from what brings you deep JOY.
I have been pondering about what people are called to do and the difference in their life and the world at large when we do that which we are called to do.
Clearly the variety is enormous and what is right for one is not right for another.
To understand the context of this post it’s important to know the background that initiated the ‘birth’ of the following story.